How To Include Your Kids In Your Elopement Day:

I often find that when people are getting married or choosing to elope and they already have a beautiful family with kids, they are usually pretty keen to include them on the day!

I already had my 2 kids when I got married, and I remember that despite considering an elopement as an option for me and my partner, I discounted the idea because I thought that I wouldn’t be able to bring my kids along – which was something that was really important to me!

To me, marriage was about becoming a family in an official sense. We would now all have the same name, and we would be connected in a way that we weren’t before. I wanted everyone in my little family to feel like it was their day. Like they were included.

Back then, I didn’t know that you COULD in fact elope with kids there, which you absolutely can!

I think this comes as quite a surprise to a lot of people, and if I knew then what I know now, I absolutely would have had a beautiful adventurous elopement with my kids!

So if you are planning an elopement and you want to know the best way to include your kids on the day, this blog post is for you!

Below I’ve listed a bunch of tips and tricks for including your kids on your elopement day, whatever that may look like:

Include your kids in your elopement day

Include your kids in your elopement day by having a really fun family ‘first look’

First looks are a really common tradition throughout both weddings and elopements, and it’s such an incredibly intimate and special moment; turning around to see your partner looking absolutely stunning in their wedding attire for the first time.

Including your kids in on that would add such a beautiful element to the experience!

If you have kids – I’m sure you’d know how excited they can get when you dress up in front of them. I know that whenever I put on something fancy in front of my kids they obsess over it, so having them included in this beautiful moment of stillness and intimacy could be really beautiful!

elopement, intimate wedding

Give them a role to play throughout the day

Little kids absolutely LOVE when they’re given important tasks to be responsible for – especially on such a big day.

If you want to include your kids in your elopement day, give them these little moments to get excited about.

Whether it’s being in charge of the flowers and walking down as the flower girl through the ceremony, or bringing up the rings as the ring bearer. They may be included in helping you get ready – tying up your shoes or zipping up your dress. Perhaps you set up an area where you can all get your makeup done together.

Whatever it is, make them feel special – like they’re a really important part of the day, because they are!

Include your kids in your elopement day

Create your own traditions

Something that I love about weddings and elopements, is that there are so many meaningful traditions that can be scattered throughout the day.

Some people pop champagne after the ceremony, some people choose to wear something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue, some people choose to cut the cake together or do a first dance.

Whichever traditions you choose to weave throughout your day, it’s a really nice opportunity to do something that really reflects who you are as a family, and take time to really bask in that gratitude and love for one another.

One of my favourite ideas for an elopement tradition with kids is to have them write little love notes to read after the ceremony. Kids love writing letters and telling you their thoughts, and they love expressing their love for you. Reading these letters after the ceremony would be such a special moment for all of you to share.

elopement, intimate wedding

One way to include your kids in your elopement day can be as simple as giving them time to talk and express their emotions

If you do decide to include your kids, it’s important to remember that they’re celebrating just as much as you are.

Encourage them to include their own personal touch to the ceremony. Let them talk through how they’re feeling and what they’re experiencing.

I think those moments where you let your kids express their emotions and have a real part to play in the day is where you create the most memorable moments.

Be realistic

You know your kids better than anyone else, and you know what they will realistically be able to handle.

I’d recommend always having a backup plan, and scheduling in enough time to have those breaks or work through those temper tantrums without adding stress to your day.

Create a schedule that makes sense for bringing your family along, and try to just go with the flow of how everyone is feeling and what they need to do in each moment.

Include your kids in your elopement day

Consider a split-day elopement or babysitter

If you do want to bring your kids along but also have those big plans of adventuring together, or even just want to make sure you have some of those moments on your own, it can be a great idea to bring along a close family friend or someone you trust to look after the kids during those times.

Whether you split the day in 2 and spend half of it with your kids and half of it alone, whether you plan for a multiple day elopement, or whether you choose to just go with the flow of how the day is panning out; having that backup option of someone who can look after the kids can be really beneficial to make sure you’re looking after yourselves too.

Include your kids in your elopement day

I want you to know too, if you decide that you don’t want to bring your kids – it’s absolutely not a selfish decision. Everybody’s family dynamics are different, and you know what will work best for your unique situation. 

There are always ways of including your kids even if they’re not physically there whether it be a face time call to show them where you are and what you’re wearing for the special day, or bringing them back little gifts from each of the places you went so they feel like they have a part of the day with them.

When I plan elopements with the couples I work with, I always work with these factors in mind.

There’s no “one size fits all” approach to planning a day like this because everybody’s expectations and situations are completely different.

I do however act as a guide, someone who can provide that support and structure to help you find the best fit for you.

If you are at all interested or you want to know more, make sure you reach out soon! I’m still taking bookings for 2021 and would love to chat with you if you’re considering planning an elopement.

Send me through a DM on instagram, an email or fill out the contact form on my website and I will be in touch!

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