The BIGGEST misconception I hear all of the time is that including your family in your elopement isn’t allowed!

This couldn’t be further from the truth!!!

Here’s the thing: A long time ago (not that long probably only about 50 years), eloping was the term used for couples who would run away to get married without the knowledge of families, friends and particularly their parents. And so in those days, including your family in your elopement was completely out of the picture.

But THESE DAYS, this isn’t the case.

Beach elopement with family walking into the sunset

Elopements in the modern world are way more about cultivating an intimate and meaningful experience for the couple. Think of it more as running away from the stresses and anxieties of a traditional wedding rather than running away from the disapproval of family and friends.


And so when I get people saying to me “I would love to elope but I just couldn’t do it without X, Y and Z there, or without my mum there or my dad there,” I totally understand!  Getting married or eloping to the love of your life is a big deal, and it makes sense that you want to celebrate with those you love around you.

But you 100% can elope WITH your family there!

Beach elopement with family and friends

I like to think that there is no right or wrong way to elope. As a concept, eloping is all about a small, intimate, intentional experience that’s meaningful to you and your partner, and if having your family there is something that will make your experience more meaningful, there are no rules that say you can’t.

It’s almost like we get so caught up in this idea of sticking to the so called rules and guidelines, that we forget about what an elopement really is at its core.


To me, an elopement is more of a concept, an ethos, a set of principles and values in which a day can be crafted around. 


The only right way to elope is the way that feels right to you, so if that means inviting a small group of family and friends you absolutely can!

Eloping couple celebrating with the woman on her husbands shoulders

BUT if you feel like you’d prefer your day to be just the two of you, that is absolutely okay too. In fact – there are a heap of ways you can still include your family and friends in your elopement day without them physically being there.


My top tips to make sure your family and friends still feel like they are a part of your special day, even if they’re not physically there:

  1. Reach out to your loved ones and ask them to write letters or words of wisdom for you to both open and read together on the morning of your elopement
  1. Invite your loved ones along to help pick out your wedding dress and wedding attire. 
  1. Take a few minutes to face time your loved ones on the morning of your elopement and share the settings and scenery with them.
  1. Throw a reception with your family and friends at a later date to celebrate the exciting milestone. This can simply be a casual backyard BBQ where you share stories and photos from the day.

There are always ways to be including your family in your elopement – whether it be them standing next to you on the day or being there in spirit.

Eloping couple holding hands smiling

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